Here is the story all about how my life got turned and twisted upside down. How we went from a family of 2 to a family of 3.
By the time your due date roles around, you are definitely ready to have the baby out. The last few weeks are the most uncomfortable. Sleep is near impossible, the baby is too big for your insides so you feel like you could explode at any moment. But then you remember how the baby has to come out, and think "holy shit never come out little baby!!" The actual thought of labour is one of the most terrifying things to cross your mind. You get pregnant, you're excited. You have all the "amazing" feelings from pregnancy. Then after feeling pregnant for eternity, the thoughts of labour start creeping in. Especially for first time mothers. We have no fucking idea what or will happen. Will I feel contractions right away? Will I be late, or early? Even if you ask women who have gone through it, they can't tell you what exactly will happen to you unless they psychic or some shit. Every body goes through it differently. Here is my story,
Our due date with Zoe was January 3rd. I was scared we would have her close to Christmas, then have to make her birthday special every year while simultaneously make Christmas equally amazing. The older she'd get, the harder it would be to maintain the magic. I know, obviously parents everywhere have to do this, but it was definitely not something I was hoping to do. Doctors would ask if I wanted the membrane sweep, I think the week of Christmas, I flat out said "No way!" I know the likelihood of the sweep working first time probably wouldn't have happened, but I wasn't going to risk it. After New years, it was game on. Got the sweep done, which was uncomfortable as shit! We didn't try ALL the 'bring on labour' schemes you google. Couldn't walk very far in the dead of winter, plus people on my street tend to not clean their sidewalks so I didn't want to fall and kill myself. We didn't try like castor oil or anything either. I read nipple stimulation was a good one. Was super damn weird though, just sitting watching TV fiddling under my own shirt. They recommended you do it for like hours or something ridiculous too. Either way, I was hella uncomfortable, didn't want to deliver too late. I expected to go a little late, it being my first child and all, but I was going to try and expedite the process as much as I could.
By some stroke *haha get it? cause I fiddled my nipples! Anyway* of luck, on Tuesday January 4th, at about 7pm, I started having slight contractions. Now, I just assumed I was cramping for some unrelated reason. I'm not sure why I didn't think it was labour. I guess when you want something so much and it actually starts to happen, you think its' just your head playing tricks on you. Julian was making us some frozen pizza's, saw me on the couch whingeing, he got real excited, "are you having a contraction?!". I said, "Nah, just a cramp, must be gassy or something." He of course did not believe me. This lasted a few more hours, I was in actual labour it turns out. We were watching some more TV. Now we were timing each contraction, not very well though, as I still naively thought I was making it all up in my head. Towards 9 or 10 at night, the contractions became harder to brush off. We called my parents, and Julian's mom. My dad was going to watch Oakley and the mothers were coming with us to the hospital. It must have been closer to 10, because I think it was 10:30 when we got to the hospital. I remember thinking in the exam room "this is easy! What is all the fuss about." as Julian and I sat laughing, sort of giddy at the fact we were about to have our first baby. Wondering if it was a boy or a girl. I got examined, but they determined I wasn't in full blown labour so I was to go downstairs and walk for 2 hours. This was, at the time, the longest 2 hour walk I would have. Also, wicked boring as there was nothing interesting in the hospital I was at. Contractions were progressively getting more intense, They got so strong I had to stop walking during every contraction. We go back upstairs after our 2 hour stroll. Back in the examination room, I am no longer laughing and joking with Julian. This is real now! Labour is not funny.
Got walked to my room. That was a long slow walk. Seemed ages from the exam room. Might as well have walked home! They got me into bed around 1230, and I never moved again til after I gave birth, about 8am. The hospital we had both our kids, we had a labour and delivery room. We didn't have to be moved once it was time to pop to another room which was amazing. There was a spouse bed in the window, where Julian slept for a bit, lucky him. I told everyone I did not want an epidural. No judgement on woman who get it done, I just thought I had to try without one. Plus a woman at work thought for sure I was going to get an epidural, so I thought "well fuck it, now I'm really not going to get one!" I'm the type if you tell me I can't do something I will do it. It was a long hard night! Hours seemed to crawl by. Every contraction was worse than the last. I think I have a high pain tolerance but this is another level. You feel the pain everywhere. Its exhausting trying to breathe through and be positive in the moment, knowing there is going to be an equal or even worse contraction coming in a minute or less. I remember looking at Julian with tears running down my cheeks saying "I can't do this anymore". The nurse was asking me if I wanted to try new positions to ease the discomfort. Apparently if you lay on your side, it takes some of the edge off. Once I got on my side, the only thing I could think of was, "if I roll back over, I'm going to punch that nurse!" I didn't of course. My back was where I was best. The bed was from like space, since it was where you would deliver also, it could change shape like a Transformer. The sat me up more upright and somehow tucked the end of the bed under me like a recliner chair. Then I sat there for 6 more hours.
We were in our 12th hour of labour. My water still hadn't broken, but I was almost 9 cm dilated. The doctors decided they were going to break my water. They built a dam with blankets I suppose and came in with their crochet hook and popped it *this is important to remember*. Holy bananas that is a feeling I will never forget. Just a huge gush of really warm goo all over my legs and feet. Julian audibly said, "wow that was weird". My contractions went into hyper drive after that. Nurses would ask me if I felt the need to push. I didn't know what the 'need to push' felt like. The 'need to push' is indescribable. From zero to a million in half a second. I was only dilated 9.5, so doctors and nurses were telling me to wait. I kept yelling "I'M PUSHING! I'M PUSHING!!" They kept telling me to stop but I couldn't help it. The doctor finally comes back in and it's go time. Nurses instruct me to give a practice push. *whatever the hell that is* but I had been involuntarily pushing that my 'practice push' pushed the head out. Then I take a deep breath, next contraction nurses and doctors yell "PUSH" and I push with every ounce and force I have for as long as I can. Julian said afterwards, he thought I was going to pass out or something. You do not what you are capable off until you are in the situation. That was it. 2 pushes and she was out. Less than an hour after my water broke *also very important to remember*. Julian's first response was, "its a girl!" This was a shock because everybody was certain we would have a boy. I was laying in this euphoria. All the pain and discomfort seemed to disappear when she came out. I had a cold since like November, and it was like I hadn't had one at all. I will never forget the feeling of peace and tranquility sort of wash over my entire body.
The aftermath of having a baby is an interesting one. I had 2nd degree tearing, probably because I wasn't entirely dilated when I started pushing, so I was getting stitched up from that. But there are at least 10 different people wandering in and out while you laying there spread eagle with a spot light on my cooter getting stitched up like a pillow. But you don't care. At least I didn't. I was holding my sweet baby Zoe. Scared shitless but at peace and happy as can be.
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